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I Still Remember Who I Was Last Summer

from An Autobiography by Old Gray

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Well I’ve changed except my heart still beats too fast and my lungs still collapse and my legs still shake. I once thought love was real when we sat atop that hill and looked at cars below. We used to grow. You kissed me on the forehead and told me that you’d never let go. You told me that you’d love me until the end. Which begs the question, are we now dead? The person I thought I knew must be the person I once trusted until my bones rusted over in the snow we used to grow like the tallest tree in my background I used to know. Well happiness and joy and bliss, how it all disappeared so quick. So here’s to life and here’s to love. I’ve said it before, that I fade with the setting sun.

My ears are still ringing from the sound of your broken heart, beating faster than thought caught in your stare, so encompassing. All resolve is lost, as words fall from your lips, my trembling fingertips, held out in question, so shake hands with regret, set to slip away. Your eyes crossing, rivers flowing under pale feet. As the moments count down to flames, meet and greet death he wears a cloak of your hopes and dreams, quenched, like the raging fire they were once. You're the breath he never found. You are the closed eyes, peacefully resting, while those around you, torn to pieces. You’re the smoke I pull to escape from thought of you. No touch. No shadow cast into mine. Your hand fervently at your side, as memories of you flow through mine, an empty space more lonesome for what it’s lost. You're the sunset smile thundering out of a careless moment. You're the tightly closed fingers, holding in a breath. If you would stay here with me for one more minute, I would steal the world.

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from An Autobiography, released March 11, 2013

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